1.  I committed to getting up early every morning with my wife and spend some quiet time with God as we read together & alone from our Bible, as well as some other books.  I also made a real commitment to journalling my thoughts, frustrations, and celebrations.  Through out seasons of my life this was something I did everyday, but only for a season.  Also, Mandy and I started praying together every morning and every night.  These practices alone have made a huge difference in our marriage, and in how I handle things daily.

2.  I started to see a counselor, actually Mandy and I both did, and it’s forever changed our marriage and my life.  Having someone to help me connect the dots to how I am feeling and how my past has directed those feelings has made a huge difference in my life and in our marriage.  Our counselor also gave us tools to communicate and to help see things from an entirely different view-point.  It’s been the best investment I’ve ever made.

3.   We turned off the TV during the week.  We decided that in our home we were not going to watch TV Monday through Friday in the evenings (except for Biggest Loser).  Instead we’ve spent time hanging out and reconnecting as a family after we’ve spent the entire day apart.

4.  I limited my social media networking to just twitter.  I’m working at finding the right balance of just what I should twitter, how much and how often to even look at it.  Along those lines I’ve also made a more deliberate effort at being engaged in the moment with those I’m physically in the presence of, not trying to stay connected to everyone all the time.

5.  I also stopped blogging, if you’ve read my blog much you may have noticed this.  The main reason was because I wasn’t sure of the purpose it was fulfilling in my life.  There are many things I would like to say, and I love blogging because it gives me a platform to share my opinions even if no one reads them.  However, I had this feeling that I was all over the place with the blog and it was becoming just another thing I was trying to do, and not something I was feeling led to do.  I tried to make some changes with it over the last year, but nothing was really clicking.

Creating this space and margin allowed me to step back and look at things differently.  It allowed me to read more books as well as my Bible.  It allowed me to listen more to others and to God.  It allowed me to invest in my relationship with my kids.  It helped me to focus on my job & ministry.  And I’ve grown personally and spiritually.  I’m a different person then what I was a year ago, or even 6 months ago.

One year later I find myself with a renewed desire and purpose to influence parents, husbands, & wives to live the best possible life God has for them.  So, what should I do with this renewed focus?  We’ll I’ve decided to shut down out of neutral completely and start a new blog with a clear focus, and to share that responsibility with my wife.  Mandy and I have started a new blog called One Thing where we’ll be sharing ideas of how you can do one thing today to grow your family or your marriage.  If you want to read more check out onethingfamily.com, if not no big deal, thanks for subscribing to Out of Neutral and reading my ridiculous ramblings for the last couple of years.

The typical Dad would much rather celebrate his child’s accomplishments and special days then his own.  Most Dad’s would rather you give honor and celebration to Mom’s because we see them playing a greater role and making personal sacrifices for the family.  As a matter of fact Dad’s will tell you they really don’t want a gift or special event.  Because Dad’s really don’t like being the center of attention.  They don’t want a special sermon with 10 reminders of how they are failing as a Father. Nor do they want a grand celebration that takes resources away from their kids or wives.  What do they really want?  I think they want to be appreciated.  They want to know that their kids love them and their wives respect them (Ephesians 5:33).  Dad’s want to know that what they do as a Father matters, and they need the affirmation from their wife, kids, and their church that they can win as a Dad.

Let me say it’s a big deal to celebrate your Dad!  Take time to let your Dad (or Husband) know that you believe in him.

Pat -
Your email totally made my day.  Thanks so much for taking the time to email me and give me such encouragement! I figure what I don’t have in pure music talent, I can make up for in energy! . I can tell you that I really love serving in KidStuff, even more than I thought I would have when I first signed up to do it.

On an average day a person goes to a job where they receive financial reward and more than likely personal satisfaction.  On an average weekend a ministry volunteer comes to a place to serve where they find complete joy in transforming lives and what they do has eternal significance.  God has given us an opportunity to invite people to experience the highest calling they’ll ever have… to change a life for eternity!

Thank you volunteers for what you do each and every week that is changing families lives for eternity!

This week: I shared that I’m learning how important my identity in Christ is (John 1-2).  Presley told us, in her 5 year old understanding, what she has learned about perseverance.  Mandy shared from Ezekiel about the Israelites disregard for God’s laws and among their sin was a disregard for the poor.  Claire shared from Psalm 2, as an honest 10 year old, that she didn’t know what it meant.  Alivia talked about feeling like a hypocrite sometimes (thanks to Charge), and that she was amazed at how Abraham would put Issac on the alter (from her personal devotions).

I’m blown away by their honesty, hunger to learn, and their questions.  To be honest I’m not always sure how to answer, but I’m reminded of something I heard Carey Nieuwhof reference in a podcast on Orange Families.  Deuteronomy 6:20, In the future, when your son asks you, “What is the meaning of the stipulations, decrees and laws the LORD our God has commanded you?”  Moses tells the Israelites to share their story and how they’ve seen God’s faithfulness.  How do we answer them, how do we teach them to follow Christ?  We tell them our story, we tell them what we are learning, we become vulnerable before them, and in turn we teach them about transformation.

In churches all over the world today people celebrated the resurrection of our Savior Jesus Christ, and there isn’t another place I would rather be this side of heaven to worship than Cross Point.  In all six services this weekend God was alive and lives were changed.  From the worship, video, and teaching to the kids, parking and greeting teams it was an incredible day.  I love being part of this staff and team!

A highlight for the Family Ministry team was our special Kidstuff Easter service where a record number of families worshiped together.  Eve and her team of volunteers knocked it out of the park as Charlie compared the transformation Christ does in us with the metamorphosis of a butterfly.  We even released live butterflies, didn’t know how it was going to work, but it came off great!

In Kidz World, Wendy and the Nashville KW team, as well as Leslie and the Dickson team knocked it out of the park, with record numbers in visitors and attendance.  You don’t have 8 services in 2 days in 2 locations without great volunteers being led by amazing leaders.  These ladies do an outstanding job and model servant leadership.

Finally, tonight we concluded our Easter Week of family devotions talking about how the resurrection brings it all together.  It was a busy week of ministry and a great week to teach our kids at home and at church about the hope that Jesus provides.  Thanks all to help make this happen this week!

Talk
In your mind, how is Easter different than any other Sunday?  What did you enjoy most about today?  What have you learned this week about Easter, that you didn’t know before?

Today is a day to celebrate that Jesus is alive! Because He is alive – we have a hope that we can live forever too!

Read Luke 24:1-12, 36-49

Think about this – what if the resurrection of Jesus didn’t happen?  If Jesus would have just died and that was the end of the story – then everything He taught, said, and did wouldn’t matter.  However, because Jesus was raised from the dead, everyone who believes in Jesus, can have eternal life.  Easter Sunday and the resurrection of Jesus are what brings it all together.

Apply: Jelly Beans
Today you probably received a lot of chocolate and candy.  I would like to give you a few more pieces of candy.  These are some special jelly beans that bring the whole story of Jesus together.  There are 6 different jelly beans that help tell the story.

1.    Speckled Jelly Bean – reminds us that it’s sin in our life that separates us from God. We are all sinners; we are born with what the Bible calls a sinful nature.  (Romans 3:23)  There is nothing we can do to close that gap, it is what Jesus does for us that closes it.

2.    Red Jelly Bean – reminds us that Jesus died on the cross, and that his death was the punishment for all of our sins.  (Romans 5:8)

3.    White Jelly Bean – reminds us that through our belief and trust in Jesus we are forgiven of all our sins. (Acts 10:43)  On the inside we are made clean, and we have a new life in Christ.

4.    Blue Jelly Bean – reminds us of baptism, which is an outward expression of an inward change. (Romans 6:3-4)

5.    Yellow Jelly Bean – reminds us of Heaven and the hope we have in eternal life. (John 14:1-3)

6.    Green Jelly Bean – reminds us of the growth that needs to take place in our life that comes through reading the Bible and drawing closer to God in worship, prayer, and serving. (Matthew 4:4, Psalm 119:11)

Pray together and feel free to enjoy the jelly beans, as long as Mom and Dad say it’s okay!

Talk
Does anyone know what today is?  Today is known as Good Friday.  It even says so on the calendar.  But it was not a good day for the followers of Jesus.  Today is the day that we remember that Jesus died on the cross.

Read Luke 23:26-56

Apply & Teach
This was a very difficult time for Jesus’ followers and friends.  The night before, they were standing next to Jesus when he was arrested.  Fearing that they might be arrested too, many of them ran and hid.  Then, they watched Jesus die on the cross while people laughed and mocked him.

Light a candle and gather around it on the floor in your living room.  Turn out all the lights except for the single candle that you are huddled around. Play a quick game of silence: count to 3 and see who can be quiet the longest.

Take notice of the silence and darkness that surrounds you right now.  How does the darkness and the silence make you feel?  Talk about how in the dark you can feel lonely.  Take turns sharing stories of times when you have been sad: what happened, why did that make you feel sad, how long were you sad?

How do you think Jesus’ friends and followers were feeling after Jesus died?  They were very sad, lonely, and confused.  Jesus was their friend and leader, and now he was gone.  They remembered that Jesus had told them he was going to die (Luke 18:31-34) and that he would come back.  But they didn’t know when or how or if they would ever see him again.  They would see Jesus again, but it would be 3 very lonely, long, dark and sad days before that would happen.

Discuss why Jesus died on the cross…  Jesus was sentenced to die on the cross even though he did nothing wrong.  Jesus chose to die on the cross for all of our sins.

Pray together.

Talk
What are some of the special holiday meals that your family shares together (Christmas, Thanksgiving, Birthday’s, etc.)?  What are some of your family holiday traditions?  What are some of your favorite foods to have at those dinners?

Jesus and his friends, the disciples, were gathering for a big meal to celebrate the Passover (a special Jewish celebration).  It was a meal that the disciples had eaten every year since they were little boys, and it was marked with exactly the same food and traditions.  However, during this meal Jesus did something that caught them totally by surprise.

Read John 13:1-17

Teach
As you can imagine, life in Bible times was very different than what we experience today, especially if you needed to go somewhere.  The main way to travel was to walk along dirt roads and paths.  Shoes were different as well.  They mostly wore sandals or even went bare foot so their feet would get very dirty.  Another difference was how they ate special meals.  Often they would gather around a table, not in chairs but reclined on the floor where their dirty feet would be close to food and to others, yuck!  For special celebrations like the Passover meal, a servant would enter the room and wash everyone’s feet so they could enjoy the meal.  It was a way to honor the guests.

On this night, the Last Supper, it was Jesus who became the servant to the disciples by washing their feet.  Picking up a towel, and big bowl of clean water Jesus went around the room to each of the 12 disciples and washed their feet.  Can you imagine – their leader and teacher taking on the role of a servant to wash their dirty, dusty, sweaty, stinky feet?  Jesus wanted them to learn an important lesson:  he wants us to serve others like he served us.

“Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.  I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.”

Apply
In following Jesus’ example, using a clean fresh towel and a large bowl of warm clean water, take turns washing each other’s feet.  When you are finished, pray together. Pray that you can follow the example that Jesus set for us to serve others.

Alivia, 7th grade, serves each Sunday morning in the Kidz World nursery.  She shares her passion for babies with her mom, Mandy.  They absolutely love babies and care so passionately for them.

Our 4th grader Claire (middle in green) and Presley (Pre-K and left of Claire in green) are part of the KidStuff Dance Team and they will be helping Mandy in the nursery during the two Saturday night services this weekend.  We are just one of many families at Cross Point that serve together each week.  I love being part of a church that allows teenagers, kids, and families to serve together.

Serving is so much a part of the discipleship experience as these kids develop their passions through serving experiences they deepen their faith and connection to God.  Research indicates (depending on which study read) that somewhere between 75-85% of kids will walk away from the church during their post graduate years.  Of those about a third will return at some point in their life.  Mainly, in my opinion, because they haven’t made the connection between faith and service.  Seeking opportunities to serve with your kids at church or in the community will help them discover the unique gifts and passion God created in them.  It will also take them to deeper places in their faith as they make the connection between what they are taught and what they do.S

Read Matthew 21:12-16

Teach
Jesus went into the temple to worship God, but what He saw there really upset him. He saw men using God’s house as a place to make money.  People would come from a long way to celebrate the Passover in Jerusalem.  They were going to the temple to worship by offering a sacrifice to God in the form of an animal.  Instead of bringing an animal from their home far away, they would buy one from the men in the temple.  These men were making money in God’s house by taking advantage of these travelers.  They were making money off of the sacrifices that were being offered to God.

Jesus said, that “My house will be called a house of prayer.”  He was so upset that he turned over tables and money went everywhere.  He chased out the men that were selling the animals.  Jesus wanted God’s house to be a place of worship

Answer these questions:
What is a proper behavior and attitude that pleases God when we worship?
Is church the only place that we can pray and worship?

Apply
Pick a couple of your family’s favorite worship songs and sing them together.